Bed Of Roses
by Sarah Meyers
Disclaimer: Again I stick with the Duh; they're not mine.
Author's Notes: This is going to turn out to be a fluff fic.. I have no idea how long it will be, or what it'll be about but it'll have no plot and serve no purpose but to fulfill my happy little thoughts about B/F.
Faith sat alone in her cheap motel room, nursing a bottle of Jack Daniels in the dark willing her memory to cease functioning. Bittersweet memories of recent weeks were plaguing her mind, offering her no escape from the pain she felt when she was alone. They were all good memories that she might look back on with a smile one day, but now they served no purpose other than to tear at her insides. To say she had a love/hate relationship with her thoughts would be an understatement. While they brought her joy, they also brought her down, making her accept the reality that she is alone. That the one she loved would never feel the same for her.
It was midday on a Saturday, but to look inside Faith's room one would think that light didn't exist. All the lights were off and dark sheets covered the windows successfully keeping the offending sunlight at bay. The brunette let her hands fumble around in the dark until they found a pack of cigarettes and she fished one out of the pack and lit it. Exhaling a puff of smoke she focused all her attention on the lit end of the cigarette, smiling to herself as she made patterns in the air with it.
When Faith drank the last of the liquor she threw the bottle across the room, wondering when she became the lovesick type. It was pathetic according to her, but somewhere even though she didn't like to admit it she liked it. She liked living her life for one person, and one person only. Even if that person would never know how she felt, or even treat her as an equal half of the time.
A soft knock was heard on the other side of her door, and she knew who it was without having to see the person. She could feel Buffy on the other side of the door. Every time the blonde was in proximity she could feel her presence, kicking all of her senses into overdrive. She could feel the blonde as if she were in her own blood, running through her veins spreading to every part of her body.
"Now's not a good time B," Faith called out, knowing that she had no desire to let Buffy see her in her present state. Tomorrow she could go back to being the little puppy dog that followed Buffy around, doing everything she wanted her to. But today was her day to hurt. And Faith knew she was no good for Buffy when she was hurting like this.
Faith sighed to herself when Buffy opened the door anyways, making a mental note to start locking her door at all times. "Wow, what's with all the dark?" Buffy asked as she walked into the room.
"Why are you here?" Faith asked coldly, thankful that the dark would hide her puffy red eyes, and Buffy wouldn't figure out that she was hurting. She wanted to be able to tell the blonde she was hurting. To make Buffy understand that she needed her, but things didn't always go how you wanted them to. Faith knew that first hand.
"I heard a song today that made me think about you," Buffy said quietly as she moved a sheet from the window to allow some light into the room.
"And you came all the way here to tell me that?" Faith questioned flatly as she lit up another cigarette.
"What the hell is wrong with you today?" Buffy snapped as she sat down on Faith's bed. Faith just raised an eyebrow at the blonde and shrugged as she took a drag from her cigarette.
"Why are you here?" Faith asked again.
"No need to get so uptight about it. I was just trying to do that whole friend thing but I guess you don't want people to act like they care do you?" Buffy shot back.
Faith stood up from her bed and looked down at the blonde, trying to control her emotions. "You're right B, I don't want people to act like they care. For once I want people to goddamn care without all the fucking acting but I guess that's too much to ask for isn't it?"
Buffy sighed and stood up as well. "I didn't mean I was acting literally Faith. I do care. Why else would I be here?" Buffy asked calmly as she placed her hand on Faith's shoulder. She could've sworn she felt Faith shudder at the contact.
"No B, you don't care. You can't care," Faith whispered as she pulled away from Buffy. "Why don't you go back to your nice little life before I fuck it all up okay? Just leave me alone and we'll both be better off. Just leave me the fuck alone for a while okay?"
Buffy was confused by the sudden change in Faith's tone, and as much as she wanted to push to find out what was wrong she feared pushing the brunette away. "I'll be back Faith," Buffy said as she walked up behind Faith.
"Whatever," Faith mumbled, wishing the blonde would go away before she started crying again. When she felt Buffy's arms encircle her waist it didn't help matters any.
Buffy held onto Faith tightly, only for a few seconds before pulling away. "I mean what I say," she whispered just before walking out of the motel room. As soon as Faith heard the door shut she fell to her knees, hugging her knees to her chest, wondering just what she could do to get Buffy.
With a renewed sense of confidence after Buffy's small display of affection Faith strode over to her bed and did some deep thinking. Obviously if she couldn't find the words to tell Buffy how she felt, that wasn't an option. Never being with Buffy wasn't an option either. As much as it scared her, she needed the blonde to be more to her than just a friend.
Finally she realized that just because she didn't know what to do, it didn't mean that no one knew what to do. A small smile formed on the brunette's lips as she thought up what she could only describe of, as one of the craziest schemes of her life. If all fails in the end, at least it'll be interesting until then. Pulling out a phone book, Faith flipped to the R's hoping she'd have some success in finding where Willow lived. After all, who would know how to get Buffy's attention better than her own best friend?
Faith strode up to Willow's house a little after three in the afternoon with a smile on her lips at the thought of actually going through with this idea. She knew if anyone truly hated her in Sunnydale, Willow was it. But if it gave her a better shot with the one she loved, she was willing to try and get along with the shy red head. Of course, the odds of Willow deciding to help her out were very small Faith assumed.
Faith knocked on the door a few times, and after receiving no answer after a minute she assumed no one was home. Just as she started walking away she heard the door open behind her and turned around to face Willow.
When Faith noticed the look on Willow's face she knew she'd have to be the one to start the talking. "Hey Red," Faith said as she smiled sheepishly at Willow. "You got a minute or two?"
Willow nodded and awkwardly invited Faith into her house and the two made their way into the spacious living room. Willow took a seat on the couch and motioned for Faith to do the same so the brunette complied trying to think of ways to tell Willow about her plan.
"So what brings you here?" Willow asked almost nervously as she shifted on the couch uncomfortably.
Faith gathered her courage and smiled at the red head before speaking. "I need your help with something," she confessed. Willow didn't respond at first and Faith watched as a wave of emotions washed over Willow's features. First there was a look of shock, which she assumed to be from the fact that she actually admitted to needing help. A few other emotions were there too, but in the end the only thing Faith noticed was the look of pride shining in Willow's soft eyes.
"You need my help?" Willow asked shyly. "Why not Buffy?"
"Because it's about B, and you're the only one who can help me." Faith paused and looked at Willow to see her reaction. Just when Willow opened her mouth to speak again Faith help up her hand to stop her. "Just let me explain first before I loose my nerve okay? Just promise me you won't get all spastic on me okay?"
Willow smiled at the comment and nodded her head in agreement as she finally got comfortable on the couch. "I guess I'll just get to the point," Faith said. "I love B like a lot, a lot and she's kinda really straight and I know I don't have a chance but I gotta try anyways and I need you to help me be more likeable by her," Faith blurted out, scared at the fact that she came close to going into an all out Willow babble.
Willow's mouth hung open as she looked into Faith's eyes searching for truth. "You mean you love Buffy as in 'I wanna hold your hand and kiss you' kind of love and not just the 'Hey you’re my friend and I love you so lets go eat cookies together' kind of love?"
Faith couldn't help but laugh at Willow's comparison between the two kinds of love as she smiled widely at the red head. "Yeah, I love her. And not in the 'Lets eat cookies' kind of way. It's more of the 'Hey I think I'm going to loose my mind and go even more psycho if I don't have you' kind. I know it sounds creepy when I put it that way, but really that's how it is." Faith said softly, amazed that she was opening up to Willow like this. A part of her mind was telling her to get help with saying as little about her feelings as possible, but a bigger part of her wanted to finally have someone she could talk to about her feelings. "So what do you say?" Faith questioned hesitantly.
Willow appeared thoughtful for a moment, as if she wasn't sure if she could trust Faith or not but finally she flashed the brunette a wide smile. "I say if you're in love then I'll do my best to help you out. After all what are friends for if not to help even in crazy, almost impossible situations like this?"
"Friends?" Faith asked. She was so taken aback by the fact that Willow used the word 'friends' pertaining to the two of them that she didn't even care about the 'almost impossible' comment.
"Why not?" Willow replied. "We might as well be if we're going to be working together and stuff," Willow told her. She was unsure of what Faith would say to that, but when she saw the size of the grin that spread across Faith's face she finally saw a glimpse of who Faith really was and it almost amazed her. She actually had the urge to hug Faith, but her better judgment told her not to. Sure Faith was being really nice now, but who knew how long it would last.
"Cool," Faith said, slipping back into her tough girl attitude. "So what do I gotta do?"
"I guess it would be too logical for me to suggest you try telling her how you feel wouldn't it?" Willow asked with a smile.
"Just a little bit. She'd freak out if I did that. I have to make her fall in love with me first. I need to be more... loveable" Faith whispered.
"Well that one's simple Faith, and you don't need my help for it," Willow assured the brunette.
"How so Red? Why can't you help me?"
"I can tell you things Buffy likes, but that's about it. The only one who can make you more loveable as you put it is you. The best and only advice I can give you on that is just be yourself. Quit hiding and let her see who you really are. You let me see a part of yourself by coming here today, do the same for her." Willow noted the lost look in Faith's eyes and she couldn't help but smile. As weird as it was for her to find out another girl was in love with her best friend, this was just too adorable to be bothered by.
"So you're saying?" Faith questioned as she pulled a piece of candy from her pocket and popped it into her mouth.
"Basically I'm saying quit with the tough girl act around her. Don't get so defensive of everything she says, and if you can't tell her how you feel show her how you feel. And you might wanna quit smoking," Willow added the last part shyly.
"Sorry, but no can do with the smoking thing. I won't change myself for anyone, not even Buffy. But I'll take you up on the rest of it. Just uhh... Don't tell anyone about this little talk okay?"
"Sure," Willow answered as she laughed. "Now what are you waiting for?" she questioned. "Go sweep her off her feet."
"I still don't know how though," Faith said as she popped another piece of candy into her mouth.
"You'll figure it out as you go along. But you've gotta be around her first, so go," Willow told her, resolve face in place.
"Yes ma'am," Faith teased as she saluted Willow. The two stood up and Willow walked Faith to the door. Against her better judgment Willow gave Faith a small hug, which the brunette awkwardly returned. "Thanks," Faith said softly as she started walking away from Willow's house. She could only hope that the red head was right, and that she'd know what to do once she was around Buffy.
"B," Faith said happily as she saw the blonde girl walking into her motel room. "Whatcha doin' here?"
Buffy's eyes narrowed as she noted the smile on the brunette's lips, noting that she had never seen Faith so relaxed. With the way Faith's eyes were glowing mischievously it reminded Buffy of a little kid who just colored on the walls. It was almost as if she was proud of something and wanted to share, even though she knew she'd get in trouble for it. "How much did you drink?" Buffy questioned with a raised eyebrow, but the grin on her face let Faith know she was asking in the friendliest of ways.
"I haven't had anything since you were here earlier. I was going to stop by your house but I got distracted so I'm glad you came here," Faith said as she repositioned herself on the bed. "Wanna go out with me?" Faith asked playfully, wondering if Buffy would catch the double meaning to her words.
"You mean like a date?" Buffy asked with wide eyes, and Faith's eyes went just as wide when Buffy asked that.
"N-not like a date date," Faith answered quickly. "Just a 'I'm sorry for being a bitch all this time' kind of date so I can make it up to you and go out with you and stuff?" Faith was nervous, and Buffy could tell. The blonde wasn't quite sure why Faith was nervous, but she did find it very endearing and cute.
"Well that all depends on where you want to go and just what you expect to do with me while we're there," Buffy teased.
Faith was thankful she wasn't drinking anything, because she was certain she would have choked on it at that moment. Not wanting to be outdone, she quickly regained her composure and smiled sexily at Buffy. "No, I think it depends on just what you'll let me do to you," Faith replied, whispering in Buffy's ear.
Buffy realized this conversation was getting just a little too awkward for her so she quickly changed the subject, something she'd become very good at with Faith. "Movies?"
"And no hanky panky?" Faith asked with a pout.
"Do you purposely like to creep me out?" Buffy asked with a smile. It used to bother her that Faith flirted so much, but lately she had become more used to it, and almost expected it. It was almost a comforting thing now, knowing that Faith's attention was on her though she didn't quite understand why.
Faith grabbed her jacket and walked over to the door and looked at Buffy. "Movies," she confirmed, successfully changing the subject. She held out her hand for the blonde, hoping that Buffy would take it. Buffy did after only a second of hesitation.
"Do you have any idea how weird you are?" Buffy asked Faith when they reached the movies, still hand in hand.
"I'm aware," Faith answered with a brilliant smile. "Video games!" Faith pulled her hand free from Buffy's and made her way to the video game machines as fast as she could. "Do you have any quarters B?"
Buffy dug in her pockets for a few seconds and finally produced a few shiny quarters and handed them to Faith. "I thought we were going to actually see a movie," Buffy teased as Faith popped a few of the quarters into a machine.
"In a few B," Faith replied distractedly. "Oh yeah," Faith said to the video game machine, and Buffy watched in amusement at the way Faith's fingers pounded on buttons and how her face lit up when she was playing. "No, left. Right, up. No you stupid piece of… Hell yeah!"
"You do realize you're talking to a machine right?" Faith mumbled an answer that was undistinguishable in the middle of a string of commands to the game machine.
"Tell me I'm not the coolest person in the world," Faith said as she finished her game.
"Umm. You're not the coolest person in the world?" Buffy replied meekly.
Faith rolled her eyes but kept smiling at Buffy. "You weren't actually supposed to tell me B. It was a rhetorical question. You aren't supposed to answer because then it means I’m not cool and you know I'm cool. I'm the coolest of cool," Faith finished, and started strutting a little.
"Again, I stick with you're the weirdest person ever," Buffy teased as the two started walking towards the theater where their movie was at.
"Well maybe I like being weird," Faith replied playfully as she wrapped her arm around Buffy's shoulder.
"Maybe I like you being weird, but that's not the point here."
"Well then what's the point?" Faith asked as they sat down inside the theater.
"Uhh… I forget?" Buffy admitted shyly.
"You really are a blonde B," Faith teased, and Buffy huffed at her. Any protest she might have had to that statement being stopped by the movie starting.
After the movie, the two were back to walking hand in hand while on their way home. Faith was trying to remember how to breathe, and Buffy seemed to think nothing of it. "So, how'd you like the movie?" Faith asked softly, bringing them out of the comfortable silence that they'd been in since leaving the theater.
"It was good.. The whole night was good," Buffy added as she smiled at Faith. "And you're a lot happier than you were earlier so that makes it even better. It was the best non-date type date I've had."
"So since it's not a date date does that mean I don't get my goodnight kiss?" Faith asked as she raised an eyebrow at Buffy.
The blonde just smiled at Faith, but remained quiet. It was a reaction that Faith wasn't sure what to do with. Normally Buffy would tease back, or even mention how uncomfortable it made her. She was never one to leave a question like that hanging in the air. Faith studied Buffy's features closely as she continued walking her home, hand in hand, both lost in their own thoughts.
When they finally reached Buffy's house Faith stopped on the sidewalk, expecting the blonde to let go of her hand and actually go inside her house. Instead Buffy stood there and studied Faith, making the brunette slightly uncomfortable. "Do you really mean it when you say things like that?"
"Huh?" Faith asked, right before remembering the question that she had asked Buffy just minutes ago. She was about to say something else but quickly decided that 'huh' was the safest answer.
"When you flirt with me, do you really mean it?" Buffy questioned sincerely, tightening her hold on Faith's hand in an attempt to show the brunette that whatever the answer was she wouldn't be freaked.
"Why are you asking that?" Faith said, trying desperately to think of what she should say.
"Just tell me, honestly and then I'll talk. Please?" Buffy asked softly, and Faith became totally helpless once the blonde gave her puppy dog eyes.
Pulling her hand free from Buffy's, Faith stole a quick glance at her before adverting her eyes to the ground. Not able to find her voice she just nodded softly and shoved her hands in her pocket while she shuffled on her feet like a nervous kid.
Buffy smiled, finding the sight to be one of the most adorable things she'd ever seen, and for the first time she realized that what Faith felt for her was indeed more than sexual attraction. That much had been known for a while, but tonight proved that Faith had deeper feelings for her than just that. She moved closer to the brunette and slid two fingers under Faith's chin so the brunette would look at her. "Come on now, it's not like my Faith to be shy."
"You're Faith?" the brunette managed to choke out, wondering what the blonde meant by that sentiment.
"Well, my Faith if you want to be," Buffy answered her.
"Always," was Faith's gentle reply, though she was still slightly unsure of all that was going on around her. "But-"
Buffy held a finger to Faith's lip effectively silencing her. "It's my turn to talk. I've known that you were attracted to me for a while Faith. You're not one to hide stuff like that. I might be blonde but I'm not dense. But you did hide that you love me until tonight. But tonight, every time you looked at me, every time you touched me, in everything you've done it's been apparent. I needed you to open up to me, to be the real Faith. You did that tonight. You finally let me in, and it made me realize that… That I love you. I'm in love with you Faith."
Faith's smile grew so large and her heart was beating so fast she thought she might explode. "That easy? You just, love me?" she questioned, unsure if she actually heard right.
"Yeah, I love you Faith. And it wasn't easy Faith. For either of us. I saw you earlier, the depression you were in. And Willow's a horrible liar so I know you went over there for help and I know that wasn't easy for you. And it certainly wasn't easy for me to realize that I'm in love with another girl. But I am, and I want you to be my Faith."
"Always," Faith repeated as she brought her hand up to cup Buffy's cheek. "I love you Buffy."
"Love you too," Buffy answered as she slowly brought their lips together for the first time. She was hesitant and cautious at first but after feeling how soft Faith's lips felt against hers she wrapped her arms around Faith's waist and pulled her closer to deepen the kiss.
"You know this ain't no fairy tale ending right?" Faith asked as she held Buffy in her arms when they broke apart.
"Close enough," Buffy replied as a wicked smile spread on her lips. She dropped a quick kiss on Faith's lips as she let her hands roam up the brunette's sides. "You know I still owe you for that blonde crack earlier right?" she asked as her fingers found Faith's sides and the brunette flinched slightly trying to suppress a giggle.
"So not fair," Faith replied as she tried to back away from Buffy. The blonde's smile just grew wider as she walked towards Faith, who quickly started running away from her new girlfriend. Buffy gladly chased after her. As the two ran around the streets chasing each other, all thoughts about being slayers and vampires and any other worry they might have were forgotten as the sound of laughter echoed in the streets. No, it wasn't the conventional fairy tale ending, but it was definitely the only ending the two slayers wanted.